Photo by Alex Boyd on Unsplash

It’s surprising to me that we’ve quickly reached a point in this flu crisis of considering re-opening the economy. For example, two of our least hit Canadian provinces have already rolled out a re-opening plan. It makes us hopeful in spite of the risk. Won’t it be nice to get back to normal. But we all have different opinions on this.

What is normal?

The problem is we have no normal anymore. We all know that life as we knew it, is over—the economy be damned.

You can open the corner candy store or you can open the hotel chains and the result will be the same; very few are going to patronize your goods and services, at least, not until we’ve figured out how to stop this virus.

So, I’m not saying we shouldn’t try to get back out there. Yet these politicians’ attempts at recovering what’s left of our economy is like trying to catch a unicorn riding into the sunset. Its already gotten away.

We’re still a long way away from economic indulgences. Travel, socializing, restaurant/bars, our favorite retailer, spa treatments, exercise and gym studios…they’re a far off dream and will remain forbidden for quite some time.

The forgotten cost of Covid-19

But in the hot topic of our economy, there is a forgotten cost of Covid-19. The seniors.

But in all of this there is a forgotten cost of Covid-19. The seniors. Aging parents and grandparents, sitting in their long term suites waiting to see their families. Click To Tweet

We may aim to reopen our economy but I’m certain as I know it will rain this month, that our seniors long-term care will not reopen to visitors anytime soon.

My mother currently lives in one such home. It is privately run and aesthetically pleasing but that is no guarantee the virus can be kept out. In fact, two cases were confirmed there as of April 1st. Of course, I freaked out when I read this in a CBC on-line news article. But a newsletter from her facility claims they are Covid free as of April 21st. Obviously, this is a status that could change at the drop of an old-timer’s hat.

It’s a fact that 50% of the total deaths due to the virus, across Canada, are the elderly in long term care. They are the victims in this health crisis.

The senior long-term care homes have upped their cleaning schedules to ensure a breakout doesn’t become a death sentence. Still, I have been struggling with the idea that my mother, who has memory challenges, but is physically mobile and still knows who her children and grand children are, is being left to isolate. Isolation will no doubt cause a spike in her loneliness (and I know it has by talking with her). This alarms me.

But I am powerless when it comes to decisions regarding my mom. She has given up her power of attorney. Nonetheless, I am of the idea that we take her out of the home temporarily, until a vaccination becomes available. I am willing to take her in to my apartment to live with me until the crisis is over.

She’s better off inside…

The belief is that she is safer from the virus living inside long-term care than with any one of us. But my mind goes to what I know to be true—she wants to be with her kids now, not alone.

Is she actually safer and at less risk of catching the virus inside the facility than she would be with me?

The truth is, I can’t answer that question with absolute certainty. It pains me to leave her there but not only is there nothing I can do about it, I have to weigh all the possible outcomes. If she lived with me and caught the virus, could I live with that?

The bottom line is this: the covid crisis has our emotions on high. Sometimes we have to accept what we can’t control and hope for the best. Do we choose quality of life or absolute isolation?

Is elderly isolation worse than the disease?

In a larger scope, there are lessons here for all of us. As our Prime Minister stated in one of his daily addresses; we have failed our elderly, the generation who built our country. The federal government sent in the army to help in the senior long-term care homes hard hit by the virus, in eastern provinces.

That scared me during my panic phase. Again, I thought, why leave mom in a facility when we could easily have her in one of our homes? I’m sure I’m not alone in this dilemma. Many of you reading this will be nodding in understanding, especially if you are facing a similar situation with your own parents.

Still, the decision has been made for her and for me. All I can do is face time or call her the old fashioned way. Sure, I could go stand below her balcony but does that replace the social needs that she has?

Opening our economy

While the politicians are hatching plans to reopen our economy, our elders remain in isolation. The hardest hit of all the population isn’t you or I because we can’t go to our favorite restaurant, or get our hair cut.

No, the hardest hit by this crisis, are the elderly who have been left in the care of nursing aides. But what the elderly want most is to see the faces of their children. To have their hand held, to be held and told that everything is going to be okay. It’s undoubtedly the very thing they gave us as children. It saddens me that I can’t give my mom that now when she needs it most.

Covid-19 hasn’t only taken our economy but it has stolen families from our elders. Let’s hope for a solution to that while we roll out an economic stimulus plan. In both cases, there are risks but the question is—are they worth it?

17 Comments

  1. Andre Surkis

    July 14, 2020 at 1:01 am

    I completely agree that it is very difficult for an elderly person to be isolated, in some cases it is worse than the disease itself. But these are the realities today …

    • lisa

      July 22, 2020 at 9:54 am

      Yes, and they are working on alleviating the situation with careful visits that are distanced and with ppe. A little is better than none at least. 🙂

  2. If You're an Empath - Lisa Thomson~Author

    June 17, 2020 at 8:53 am

    […] The Forgotten Costs of Covid-19 […]

  3. DGKaye

    May 19, 2020 at 6:08 pm

    Riveting piece Lis. And may I first say, had I not specifically looking in my junk mail for something, I wouldn’t have found 2 of your posts there! I was wondering why you hadn’t posted for awhile, lol. But seriously now, all you said I’m 100% with you about the state of these senior homes. These are crazy uncertain times, and one thing for sure, nobody is in a hurry to go back to uncertainty. I feel like we’re really in a holding pattern right now before we land. Oye! Hugs and be safe. <3

    • lisa

      May 20, 2020 at 8:21 am

      Thank you, Deb. That’s a shame my MailChimp campaign went into your junk mail 😛 but glad you popped over! It’s really hard to not know and live in uncertainty. A holding pattern is a good way to describe it. Hugs and be safe, too, Deb. I know how cautious you’ve been and in taking care of your husband. Keep on…we are also staying in still. We’ll see if the numbers change in the next few weeks.

      • DGKaye

        May 21, 2020 at 6:35 pm

        Let us hope! Hugs. <3 xx

        • lisa

          May 21, 2020 at 8:39 pm

          Yes. Hugs <3

  4. Reema Choubey

    May 18, 2020 at 5:47 am

    Well said .The economic costs is much higher than the health cost for any economy to endure affected by covid 19 whether by imposition of complete lockdown to partial reopening thereby affecting millions of people as their life turned upside down from being laid off from the job to being pestered to work from home though it is not possible to work from home given the kind of and inadequate resource that some people possess at their disposal to execute the projects etc…And millions but billions of Migrant workers being thrown out of their jobs being rendered destitute in one of the country in Asia are some of the thing worth considering to those who could help but are not doing so adequately…

    • lisa

      May 18, 2020 at 7:23 pm

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

  5. Christine Carter

    May 15, 2020 at 5:58 am

    Lisa, I’m so sorry you have had to make such a HARD decision with your mom. I can imagine how awful it is to not see her and worry about her care every single day this pandemic continues. I nodded through every word you wrote and although my mom lives in an independent senior living building, she lives alone and I worry about her every day too. Of course, they closed it down so there are no visitors or gatherings. Only one family member at a time can visit. We decided soon after this whole thing hit, that my sister and I would take turns visiting her and caring for her every day. My mom is near-blind and has neuropathy in her legs. She can’t do life without our help. We are doing everything we can to take care of her, keep her healthy and well, and make her feel less alone during these times.

    It’s terrifying that our seniors are at great risk, It’s horrific that so many have suffered and died from this virus, and it’s heartbreaking that so many are living in isolation, loneliness, and fear.

    • lisa

      May 15, 2020 at 10:18 am

      It’s such a difficult time. I don’t worry so much about the care she is getting as I believe it is very good. But I do worry about her isolation.
      It’s a relief that at least you and your sister can see your mom. Still very difficult to deal with alone and not be able to enjoy the usual things together. I don’t see this ending anytime soon, either. Definitely been horrific in most care homes as they weren’t prepared for a pandemic. Can anyone really prepare for such an event? Hospitals maybe, and they even struggled with it.
      Let’s hope for the best for our moms. Sounds like you have this, Chris and are doing all you can. Hugs.

  6. Suzanne @ The Bookish Libra

    May 10, 2020 at 8:42 am

    Great topic. I lean toward being very cautious about reopening everything too soon. Maybe I’m naive and maybe I’d feel differently if I wasn’t able to work from home so easily, but I just don’t get why people (i.e. the protesters I keep seeing on TV that look like something out of a dystopian novel) are behaving the way they are. Bottom line for me is that I want to do my part to protect the most vulnerable members of our society. Being able to eat out at restaurants and going to get my hair cut are not priorities, especially if it means sacrificing our seniors.

    I know the loneliness of living under lockdown can be awful so I know I’m very grateful that my older relatives at least have access to things like Facetime and Skype so we can at least chat “face to face” even if we can’t be there in person.

    • lisa

      May 10, 2020 at 10:45 am

      You have your head on straight about this 🙂
      Also, you’re right about people who can’t work from home. Everyone has been deeply affected economically by this virus. Unfortunately, the risk is still quite severe. As much as I want to see our economy buzzing again, I suspect the stats will rise again. We have to use our common sense while returning to our new ‘normal’.

      Yeah, there is a group of people out there who are taking the social distancing recommendations as personal affronts and as a right that is being taken away from them. I do wonder what they would’ve done during world wars? They seem to forget that we have a government for a reason and this is one of them. Order in chaos…support during extreme depressions…etc.

      Yes, the video calls really help. My mom cannot operate tech stuff very well though. She doesn’t have Skype but I get her to have a nurse aide help her set her phone on wifi. So, it’s a bit of a deal to see her face but she does enjoy the video call. Well, we’ll make the best of it.
      Happy mother’s day to you, Suzanne. I hope you have a relaxing one.

  7. Clinton Taylor

    May 8, 2020 at 8:25 pm

    What about the loss of our liberties and our rights watch this clip of Ron Paul he’s been a long time serving member of the US Congress and ran for President and wants to cut down on big waste of government bureaucrats and the artificial manipulation of the economy I don’t believe its a recession but a depression that its planned

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z0AwLPBcBnM

    you won’t believe what I saw in the world markets the other day – $40 a barrel for crude oil in the spot market and no where to store it no one wants to take delivery of it and this will end ugly with them destroying the purchasing power of your money and through taxation which is a double negative good

    • lisa

      May 9, 2020 at 12:43 pm

      What loss of liberties? Our rights to what?
      Sacrifices of liberty are made for the greater good, like in world wars. Our staying home to prevent spread is nothing in comparison, right? Not to mention it’s temporary.
      Thanks for sharing the link.

  8. Tamara

    May 8, 2020 at 3:38 pm

    It’s such a tough debate lately. I see both sides, but of course lean heavily on the staying home and not getting people (or myself) sick.
    Other times I fantasize about going to Disney World when they reopen and it being virtually empty. haha.
    In our little county, most of the deaths were related to senior homes. It’s crushing. Just crushing.
    I miss life so much and I think the mental health aspects of this are sometimes stronger than the disease. Like I have a family member with very severe depression and his parents went to visit him. I don’t think they touched but I do think in his case, depression is more dangerous than COVID-19.
    Ugh, just all a nightmare.

    • lisa

      May 8, 2020 at 6:39 pm

      Yes! I know it. I’m tending to relax a bit now but it might be too soon. I like that idea of having Disney World all to yourself (with the family of course :P)

      It really is crushing. It’s so tough to hear about and knowing many were alone when they passed because of visitation restrictions.

      I agree, Tamara. Good to hear his parents were able to see him. This whole isolation thing really magnifies the mental health issues and loneliness. Well, let’s hope the social distancing restrictions will be lifted soon. Seems like a lose/lose scenario though.

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