Are You Lonesome Tonight?

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April 23, 2019
Are You Lonesome Tonight? Why being alone and being lonely don't have to be interchangeable.
Image source Unsplash by Kristina Tripovic

“Are you lonesome tonight? Do you miss me tonight?”

The words to that old Elvis song always tug at my heartstrings. I picture my grandmother mending socks, humming along to this song playing on her kitchen radio. She became a widow quite young. She wasn’t even 60 yet. She lived alone until the day she died (excluding her final years in a care home).

One of the hardest adjustments during divorce, is finding yourself alone. Alone. Just that simple word conjures up all kinds of not so nice feelings. When you’re alone, is it because no one wants you?

Fear of Change is Death While Living

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January 31, 2019

I was inspired by Marc Chernoff’s recent post at Marc & Angel hack Life. Marc lists ten hard things you shouldn’t be afraid of doing for yourself. What I took away from this list is that fear of change is the underlying culprit of happiness or the cause of —death while living.

In his post, every single thing Marc listed resonated with me. Usually when I read a ten reasons or tips post, I can take away half of them and leave the rest. Not this time.

10 Ways To Make a New Home After Divorce

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July 19, 2018

10 ways to make a new home for you and your children after divorce

image source Unsplash by Christopher Harris

I’m  re-posting an updated, yet classic from the archives.

One of the biggest changes during divorce is losing the marital home, which I have written about before here.

It’s a loss that isn’t easy to swallow for many couples who have taken pride in their home. Dare I say, they’ve considered their home something of a status symbol or a page out of a decorating magazine? That will all change. You’ll see though, that what really matters isn’t the shell of a home but who and what is inside it.

How Many Suitcases Are You Carrying?

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May 16, 2017

How many suitcases are you carrying?

image source; coffeecigarettesmagazines.blogspot.com

We’re all carrying at least one suitcase with us, day in, day out. It’s our baggage. It’s full of our own personal issues; lies, denial, delusions, past wrongs, blame, hope for the future.

Making a New Home for You & Your Children After Divorce

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April 2, 2017

Making a new home for you and your children after divorce

image source Dreamstime

One of the biggest changes during divorce is losing the marital home, which I have written about before here.

It’s a loss that isn’t easy to swallow for many couples who have taken pride in their home. Dare I say, they’ve considered their home something of a status symbol or a page out of a decorating magazine? That will all change. You’ll see though that what really matters isn’t the shell of a home but who and what is inside it.

Who’s That Girl?

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September 27, 2016

who's that girl

image source creative commons

Who’s that girl? They whisper as you walk away. “I used to know her when…” Reluctant to look you in the eye, they’ll watch you walk away. Their eyes burn your back. Talking to one another in hushed tones, they lean together conspiratorially. You would smile and say hello if only they would acknowledge you. Even so, you walk away with your head held high.

Can We Go Home Again?

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September 1, 2016

Can We Go Home Again?

Memory sketch of the back view of our old home

On facebook the other day, a divorced father and friend of mine (from one of the first divorce support groups I belonged to) posted an interesting set of photos. The status update read “went to see the old house today with the kids. We peeked inside the windows and went in the backyard. I planted that tree and look how big it is now.” He had some of his old photos mixed in with photos he took of the kids beside the tree today. I thought it was really great how he had images of 10 years ago and today, how the kids and trees had grown. Bitter-sweet, I think.

It got me thinking about my recent view of my old marital home, where my babies were born. I didn’t get to walk around and peek in windows. My view was a virtual one. I couldn’t see the back of the house but this sketch is from memory. It’s obvious I’m not an architect 😉 I must practice my sketching skills but I digress.

“Lisa, You’ve Changed…”

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August 10, 2016

lisa, you've changed“Lisa, you’ve changed.” he said. I wanted to answer;

“Yes, you’ve changed me.” Instead, I simply stared and waited for him to finish his point, which he did not.

I won’t say who said it or when. I will say that it’s been said by more than one person. I will also say that it’s true. I have changed. Since when? I’m not sure…but I have changed. Here’s the thing, I’m a human being. I’m not an inanimate object. If I’m not changing then I must be dead.

It’s okay to change isn’t it?

10 Things I Wish I Knew Before My Divorce

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March 16, 2016

10 things i wish i knew

image source pinterest

Isn’t it true that we have to go through something to really understand it? We can plan and have opinions about something but until it happens to us we don’t grasp the full concept. Divorce is no different. I guess it’s a little like death of a loved one. Again, it’s something we have to go through, get to the other side before we understand it.

Recipe For A New You After Divorce

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February 17, 2016

I’m delighted to introduce to you my guest today, Liv of Live By Surprise. Lively Liv as I like to call her 🙂 If you’ve been anywhere on divorce support blogs and sites you’ll likely see her name. She’s full of energy and writing all over the place because everyone wants to know what she thinks…here she is now!

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