I’m sharing my reading of an excerpt from my latest book, The Wine Diaries: Musings on Divorce Paired With Wine. From Chapter 4, Life Unexpected, I read “What I’ve Learned So Far”. This is one of my favorite essays in the book. I think you will relate to the message that small, compounded moments make up what we call our LIFE. That’s why those moments are so important and even more so than the big, dramatic ones that we anticipate for months or even years.
I was inspired by Marc Chernoff’s recent post at Marc & Angel hack Life. Marc lists ten hard things you shouldn’t be afraid of doing for yourself. What I took away from this list is that fear of change is the underlying culprit of happiness or the cause of —death while living.
In his post, every single thing Marc listed resonated with me. Usually when I read a ten reasons or tips post, I can take away half of them and leave the rest. Not this time.
image source Pinterest
As we all know, it’s difficult to initiate divorce. Imagine what it was like over one hundred years ago?
In order to get a divorce in Canada back in 1890’s to 1920’s, you had to apply to the Canada Gazette. This required the petitioner to disclose and publish for all to see, details of the demise of the marriage. Not until six months passed would the divorce be considered by Parliament (which would pass an “Act of Divorce”) nullifying the marriage.
Now, imagine being married to an abusive alcoholic with two small children in the late nineteenth century? That was exactly the position Priscilla, the original Escapee, found herself in. Her younger sister also lived in
image source Unsplash by Christopher Harris
I’m re-posting an updated, yet classic from the archives.
One of the biggest changes during divorce is losing the marital home, which I have written about before here.
It’s a loss that isn’t easy to swallow for many couples who have taken pride in their home. Dare I say, they’ve considered their home something of a status symbol or a page out of a decorating magazine? That will all change. You’ll see though, that what really matters isn’t the shell of a home but who and what is inside it.
A list of ten things seems to be a nice way to reflect on complex issues. You can check out my previous post listing 10 Things I Wish I Knew Before My Divorce. Although today’s list is similar, I wanted to emphasize some new points.
It’s like my older self is telling my younger (about to get divorced) self, what to expect.
Photo by Kyle Broad on Unsplash
It’s no secret that the initial stages of divorce prove to be the most dangerous time in a woman’s life. Yet, we tend to remain positively naive. That makes sense of course, because we’re going through so much for the first time and we are unaware of the hidden or subtle vulnerabilities.
image source rodeo.net
Are you inked? If not, are you thinking about getting a tattoo? Are these thoughts connected to an event in your life such as divorce, marriage, death, love?
It’s human nature to want to mark an event with a celebration or a ceremony and sometimes with INK.
image source Dreamstime
One of the biggest changes during divorce is losing the marital home, which I have written about before here.
It’s a loss that isn’t easy to swallow for many couples who have taken pride in their home. Dare I say, they’ve considered their home something of a status symbol or a page out of a decorating magazine? That will all change. You’ll see though that what really matters isn’t the shell of a home but who and what is inside it.
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